2008

Life in this RV- Cold. Lonely at times. Lovely at times. I am here to be educated. By myself, by nature, by a kindred soul. I have found a sliver of peace but a slice of restlessness. Peace with life- restless with my life’s motion. I wish this RV could move. But it is dead. Sitting cold- parked at the edge of the woods. The enchanted grove is close- my place to toke, listen, and be heard. Here I feel alive- more human and less of an artist. The moon is my friend in any hour of desperation. My wingman when i have no words.

From Art

How do we give of ourselves? How do you give to yourself? Be self-centered at times- close your chackras at times. Be consistent at times. But loosen your grip on it all at times- loose your mind, loose your body, loose time. Wiggle room. Make space in your mind to create your sanctuary for contemplation- and meditation. I have smashed my brain into nothingness, blended it til only goo is left. I have been open to the world- but one must shun away when being watched- judged. When you need someone to know about you- that they can trust and depend on you. Can one do that if your identity is the world and all ideas within?

From Art

Clubbing. Beat your brain to smitherings. Than start over. The world does not need an intervention with all its closest relatives, it does not need a new cycle in the stars to change its ways. The world, and all of us in it, need to say FUCK ME. Get rid of the old and decrepid. Again, create space for the new, and renewed. You. Us. The World. You identify with You. Identify with me. Be with me. I will be you.

From Art

Ah yes the changing of the seasons. The mutable. Change, adapt, find peace within through the torrent outside. A sense of purpose, a fire for motion. Leaves are dancing. Madly! They fall- graze my fingertips, and spin wildly to let us know they are there. One is scooped up in the gregarious wind. It takes you far from home and finally puts you down to rest amongst the yellow, browns, and reds. All dying- but finally independent. Sharing yourself with new ideas- giving your touch away selflessly. The wind is our mode of travel- to break out and break on through. Our happy decaying brown sister who smiles to be this wild thing. This curious and mutable wild thing with only the wind on her side.

From Art

We walk these streets day and night. We pass by each other with our lips puckered and eyes squinted. Our eyebrows furrowed, our heads stooped down. We walk steadily and firmly past one another. We are scared and we are in this spotlight. For seconds the world is staring at you and you pretend not to care. It knows that you stay cool to avoid confrontation- or direction. It knows you avoid friends, you avoid intuition. You prefer to be anonymous- even to yourself. The world though, has no perspective and no bias. The world sees right through the personal marketing.

We wake in the morning and wait for the warmth and comfort the lies of our egos offer us. The lies- I am stable, I am unique, I am a possibility, I am the future. The truth- I am, we are. To be "cool" is to deny others and yourself the true and perfect vision of your body- your soul. All the vulnerabilities existing on the surface. All the scars, the breaks, cracks- all visible- to you and to those you contact.

From Art

We share with each other- we share substance, we share language, we share ideas. Empathy- gained through eliminating cultural differences and relying on the human animal. Perspective- gained through listening to experience- and allowing those people to open up to you. Go to everyone with an attitude to learn- soak in their perspective- adopt part of the human experience they show you. Adopt a look on their face, adopt a phrase, adopt this wisdom to make your life easier- and certainly more interesting. But never concluded.

From Art

Imagination is limitless but this mind is bounded to this physical world. So I jump in the purple two seater and head towards space- turn on, tune in, dropout. Fly from the rat race of Babylon. Forty minutes later and I burst through the restrictive atmosphere- a new realm. Thoughts different, perceptions changed, ego split. I am the driver and the passenger.

From Art

I am decided. Learn my lessons through life, take the high road. School is the low, the agreement of fear. The delay of thought, or at least the delay of inner thoughts, and the encouragement of lazy ego development. I chose to throw myself in the fire. I want to burn, but the scars are more beautiful and more unique than your pale plush shell. Fear is still in my heart but as a calm fear- or more of a knowing. An ironic belief- one we all share. A nasty temptation made up in our heads. I fear to be alone.

From Art

I have ambition but exist in the moment fully. I am philosophical but am dependent on sensuality. I have ideation but lack much of the power to carry out. I need motivation to be successful in Babylon. In the woods I could stay forever- and change nothing but myself. But by flying over Babylon I can sprinkle love and inspiration for those below me. There is fire in the sky- put that fire in your heart and into your life. Consume life- do not coexist with it. Breathe the fire of life through expanding consciousness and empathy. Evolve into a uniquely extroverted being- existing in each other as much as ourselves.

From Art

A universal blanket of human consciousness- one full of love. Look out past our skies and into space- see the stars. Those external personalities manifested internally- our friends and teachers dancing in the black stretch of night. As the sun rises the ego awakens with it. Our fear sputters around all day long but at night our wolf comes out- the moon breathes a new rhythm into our lungs- and we exist as ourselves. Once- we relied on the moon, but light shown down and gave us wisdom- and fear.

From Art

Where is the truth? We can pretend. But we must deduct from our lives our own truth- what makes us happy? How do we make others happy? We must take enough interest in ourselves. I must take an interest in my emotions. I have had my eyes closed, but I can open them. When? How? Will they open at the right time? Will I naturally fall in line with this new sight? Trust myself and my instincts- because I have experiences. I have life, concrete ideas, yes and no. I need life, abstractions, love and suffering. Pain belongs if it is all the pink you can get- sorrow in your heart is favorable as long as you feel.

From Art

But my heart is solid, soul empty, brain disciplined. Yet I am nothing and have nothing, but- but fear and longing for something more. I can say one thing and feel nothing. Sound of love but no flutter. Pain is the start- to a new being. Physical and Emotional. I am on the path to learn- to love and be loved. I- We must let each other in. Because we will find ourselves already there. Two souls meet- two abstractions braided into one. One Love. One Love Forever.

From Art

The wind, it pours over us. And we pour over each other. The next step of evolution shown right now- acceptance, trust, and loyalty. Loyalty to each other and the passion of life both of us share. We can fly, we burn, we fight and die in the end for and because of each other. We die and arise again-as ash and dust. The beautiful forceful karmic nature of the universe. Consciousness, practical madness- followed by nirvana- the final silencing of our minds. Final acceptance of what we are. We are a part of everything but once we loose our tether we finally become everything. At this moment though- we are alive. Get up and dance- or sit down and melt away. Just be- and become- nothing. The final blossom- the escape from protective Mother Earth.

From Art